IF YOU ARE WRONG, ADMIT IT - DALE CARNEGIE INTRODUCTION: ...
IF YOU ARE WRONG, ADMIT IT
- DALE CARNEGIE
INTRODUCTION:
It is an advice for those moving up the ladder of success. Dale Carnegie says that, we must admit quickly when we are wrong. Carnegie points out that when you are wrong you can turn the tablets by admitting you are wrong quickly and emphatically. We need courage to admit our errors. It is a sign of honesty and nobility. We avoid feeling guilty.
DALE CARNEGIE WITH THE DOG REX AND POLICEMAN:
The author provides an example when the police officer lectured him for not having his dog on a leash and not wearing a muzzle. However, Carnegie liked to run with his dog and the dog did not like the muzzle or the leash. Carnegie got away with this in the park for sometime before encountering the officer again. The park was empty and ran ahead of Carnegie right into the mounted police officer. Carnegie responded by admonishing himself and admitting his errant way. The officer reacted in a kind manner giving him a pass since the park was empty. Carnegie claims it is better to beat the person to the punch. It is easier to bear self- criticism than be condemned by another. Carnegie points out that fools try to defend mistakes.
FERDINAND WARREN WITH HIS ART DIRECTOR:
Ferdinand warren was a commercial artist known to Dale Carnegie. He used to make drawings for advertising for advertising and publishing purposes. One day, an editor found an error in warren's work. He was upset. He requested about it. Art director planned to criticize warren, but he did not give a chance to him. He criticized himself for the first time. Instead of giving excuses for his blunder warren honestly admitted his fault. He said that he had taken up drawing for him for a long time, yet he had not learnt the job properly. Immediately the art editor defended him that it was not a serious mistake. Warren requested him to give a lot of work so that he would do the best. This honest confession pacified the editor. Later the editor said that it was a minor mistake of warren that could be rectified. He has a friendly chat later and offered him lunch. He ignored the slight error and asked for a minor change.
HARVEY'S DISCOVERY OF ERROR:
Bruce Harvey of Albuquerque, new mexico, had incorrectly authorized payment of full wage to an employee on a sick leave. When he discovered his error, he explained to the employee that his next pay Cheque would be reduced. The poor employee requested him that it would lead him to a financial problem. Harvey wanted to convey this issue to his boss. Harvey went to the office to meet the boss. He explained the whole matter to him and admitted that was his fault. The boss replied that it was the fault of the personnel department, and accounting department. Again, Harvey wanted to explain to him that his mistake. His boss did not affected anyone. Hence his boss treated him with respect.
ROBERT LEE'S BRILLIANT AND PICTURESQUE ATTACK:
Robert E. Lee is the way he blamed himself and only himself for the failure of Pickett's charge at Gettysburg. Pickett made a brilliant and picturesque attack on lee. lee was defeated by Pickett. Pickett had long hair that touched his shoulder. lee was upset that he sent a resignation letter to Jefferson Davis the president of confederacy to appoint " a young and abler man". If lee wished, he would have blamed his troop for his defeat because his cavalry hadn't arrived in time to support him. Some of his commanders had failed him. But he arrived in time to support him. lee wished to meet the enemy alone, to say " all this has been my fault". Only few generals have this attitude to admit their mistakes. But he admitted that he was responsible for the defeat. Some great people had courage to admit their mistakes.
CHINESE CONVICTIONS:
According to Chinese tradition, they do believe that the elders should not ask for an apology to the youngsters. So it is responsibility of the youngsters to take the first step to reunion. Michel Cheung was an opium addict. He was alienated from his son for many years. The father felt that young people should have respect for their elders and that he was right in not giving into his desire, but to wait for his son to come to him. He wanted his son to compromise him but it did not happen. The father longed to reunite with the family so he approached his son to pardon him.
CONCLUSION:
We need courage to admit our errors. It is a sign of nobility and honesty. we avoid feeling guilty. It also helps solve problems. It leads to self-esteem. Objective in our relationships is to move forward productively. Almost always in these cases the difficult person has a combination of security, esteem, and recognition issues. We will need to assess those situations and handle them in ways unique to the individual.
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